Category: Case Law

It is settled law that any cat who fits inside a box owns the box. It is less settled whether a cat who does not quite fit, but is sitting in it anyway, retains the same rights. This question reached our office last Tuesday when Ms. Pixie, a Maine Coon, attempted to occupy a shoe box.

After three hours of deliberation, Senior Partner Mewsley ruled that the doctrine extends to partial occupancy, so long as at least one paw and the dignity of the cat are inside. Ms. Pixie’s tail, which remained outside, was reclassified as a separate entity and is now suing her.

Few cases have shaped modern feline jurisprudence like Doe v. The Closed Door (2023). The plaintiff, a cat identified only as Doe, argued that a door which is closed on one side and open on the other creates an unresolved legal state, known as the Schrodinger Provision.

• Held: a cat on either side of a door has a vested right to be on the other side.
• Held: the right is exercised immediately upon being granted.
• Held: the right expires the moment the door is opened.

The court noted, in a footnote, that the door had no comment. We cite this case daily.